Ghost to Ghost

Aboriginal man, aboriginal TV repairman,
I worked most of my life in Melbourne and Sydney,
telecine to kinescope, film into TV in the Menzies Hotel,
ghost to ghost from American studios,
but now I don't die into ghost TV,
I don't die into kinescope neither,
I die into fire and stars and whispers.

Teach

I coulda been a made man!
I coulda teached to teach!

I coulda traded my socks for
cosmic moxie!

I coulda ate a bomb!
I coulda teached to teach!

True As Snow

Flounce around in your
doleful opulence if you want to!
We still live in a bubble!

We live in a mumble-a-bumble!
We live in a bai-bai-bai-bai!
We live in a wobble-a-bobble!

We live in a bubble in Mumbai.

Late Date at Wal-Face

You toyed with a
boy who was
obviously annoyed with
himself.

I scattered my change
all over the
check-out lane!

I scattered my change
all over the
check-out lane!

Is this

your place or my place?
Is this

your place or my place?

I can't even
see my face

myself.

Invisible Friend

I live in the
darkest shadow in every room.

I am close.

Are you listening?
I am

closer than your breath.

Hinge

Are you a dainty eater?
Are we bonding with bodies or antibodies?

Do you own a home-made bomb?
Are you wearing a beak?
Is your woowoo a widget?

Hey Grandma!

Did you hear the big hinge squeak?

Mermaid

When you land on Mars,
all the

Martians rush out of their
hidey-holes and ask you...

"What's it like to be a mermaid?"

It's like dancing a jig on the
wings of a wig!

It's the way you would feel in your
ideal chemise!

Scream

Kill them all!
Kill the sequel!

Kill them all!
Kill the franchise!

Kill them all!
Kill them all!
Kill them all!

Kill every human being,
except a few slutty teenage girls.

Romance

"I love you like a lunatic!"
This is very romantic.

"I eat like a lunatic!"
This begins to be creepy.

"I practice medicine like a lunatic!"
What?

"I fuck like a lunatic!"
And here we go again!

Dirge

In 1992 I won a life-time
supply of Fig Newtons which
Nabisco would only deliver to my "actual residence,"
and even after I explained that my
"actual residence" is the endless cycle of eternity,
Nabisco nevertheless refused to deliver my
life-time supply to a lake-side
ashram in Minnesota,
where Flora and I once recited
a dirge for Derwood Robinson.

Every monk in that ashram was
crazy about Fig Newtons!

Malibu

We rented this house on the beach to write lyrics
and most of the time we were happy, I guess.

Then we moved to Seal Beach, then New York,
then the far-away stars and the dark behind the dark.

Surprise!

This was the season when we
learned to play the nocturnes...


Big

           slow

                       balloons

                                 bouncing

                                         around

                                              an

                                         empty

                                 ballroom.

This was the season of oysters and curtseys!
Tenors singing on sentry duty!

Your mom hired a druid to read the runes!

Your mom hired a druid to read the runes,
and all of them were curses!

Maggot

Maggot walks into an
art museum and says...

"Show me the meat!"

It's a fast-moving maggot!
Maggot bigger than a hog!

Then it gobbles up the guard and
charges into a mob of tourists!

Maggot bigger than a Buick!
Maggot faster than a Maserati!

You can't get away!

You defaulted on your mortgage!
You don't even own a car!

All you want to do is vegetate!

Meanwhile the maggot eats Beirut!
Maggot eats Greenwich Village!

You can't kill it with hate-mail!

Maggot brighter than a thousand suns!
Maggot bigger than New York!

Bad Guess

Is this book about cannibals?
Yes.
Is there more than one cannibal in it?
Yes.
Did you marry a cannibal?
Yes and no.

I saw thousands of cannibals on a beach in Malibu
and all of them died of old age or drowning.

Promo

I bought you a tacky watch!
I attached a catchy tag-line to your wacky cat-walk!

Woman, what do you want from me?

I gave you everything I had!
I can't give you any more!